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Steve,
My friend, Stacey, sent your blog to me, and I just have to tell you — you are an amazing writer and thought-provoker! I have read several of your postings, and I have laughed out loud, totally agreed, teared up a bit, and all that. And, what I appreciate most is that I can tell through your writings that you truly enjoy musing on these topics … your times in college, in the service, Black folks, growing up, etc. I look forward to more of your musings …
SylvieD: I’m speechless and in awe of your comments. I really appreciate your words of inspiration and I am in total and utter gratification. Thanks so much your taking the time to read the craziness that I have neatly put into this blog. I guess in a sense I’m doing a little purging of sorts and at the same time providing a ittle self-therapy. Thanks again for sharing this with me and come on back ya hear! Oh and tell Stacey I’m salty that she didn’t come and watch the fight with me….hey…that might be my next entry!
Peace & Love
I’d just come from a baby shower where I was one of the few single women with no kids feeln like an outcast. In my mid-30s celibate and bout to pull my hair out every month but scared to sleep with dude I’m in love with b/c he tells me he doesn’t want a relationship so I keep it on loc so that I don’t get confuse and whipped. Then I found your website by googling looking 4 answers to why brothers wont date women that are trying to keep it pure until marriage or atleast a serious commitment or exclusive relationship. After reading your views on marriage and relationship I see why old boy keeps me on the shelf. Celibacy is hard but what is the alternative? Sex w/o relationship and hope you’re the chosen one?????
tmichelle - Although I honor your committment to respect your “goods” by not laying it out for every Tom, Dick & Tyrone a part of me feels that your only delaying the inevitable. Intimacy is such a huge part of any relationship so at some point and time your going to have to cross that fork in the road. Have you told dude how you feel? How does he feel about you? And please don’t feel like an outcast, some if your bird friends are just having shorties because its trendy and they don’t have a clue, you continue to take your time and make the best choice for you.
Thanks MadPoetic 4 the encouragement. You hit it dead on the money about me delaying the inevitable b/c that’s how I feel although I desire to do it the right way. Dude is serious about not being in a relationship w/o sex until marriage in which I understand his sexual needs b/c I have the same needs but at the same time he doesn’t want to committ. He’s not oppose if it leads to a committment. We been here for the last year or so, just stuck. I’m not trying to control this thing but I don’t want to be in a relationship by myself, been there before and it wasn’t pretty. Just trying a different approach this time around. I’m grown and I have to be accountable for my actions. Can’t blame a dude just cause I got confused and thought it was more and it really wasn’t. I know if we go there I’m gone so that’s why I keep it on loc to keep me in control of my emotions. When we’re together the pressure is so intense because we want each other so bad until we can taste it but because we want 2 different things I don’t allow it to get that far but a sistah be sweaten like a mug LOL!!!!! Help me man. Give me some insite to this dilemma. I wish I could be with him and not have feelings but I’m just not built that way. How do men do it and disconnect??????
I love reading your blog.
You make me laugh when i am pissed and encourage me when i feel beat down - you are an amazing writer and what i feel to be a good friend.
I will forever be reading ur blogs even when there is not a new one i go back to catch up!
College IT classes gives me plenty of time believe me!!!
Take care sweetie and i will be commenting very soon!
Young1
xXx
Young1 - Awww….thanks sweetie!!! That means so much to me…you can’t even know how I feel right now. I really appreciate yor kind words!
I crossed that fork in the road…
tmichelle - Word!!! Do tell…
So worth the wait!